Super Stupid

Birther Larry Klayman is Suing the President for Oppressing Him

Birther, leader of the failed movement to overthrow the government, and man who somehow still has a right to practice law Larry Klayman has filed a lawsuit against President Obama, former Attorney General Eric Holder, Black Lives Matter, Louis Farrakhan, and Al Sharpton (???) for "endangering" his life.

The way Larry Klayman see things, the president is responsible for the shooting of police officers and the shooting of black citizens and it's only a matter of time until Klayman himself is killed.

via RightWingWatch

Klayman managed to blame Obama not only for the shooting of police officers in Dallas, but also for the police shootings of two African Americans in Louisiana and Minnesota that sparked last week’s Black Lives Matter protests. “It is no wonder some cops, fearing for their lives in this anti-white, anti-Semitic and anti-Christian environment, sometimes are prone to literally pull the trigger too quickly,” he wrote. “With the hateful mood created by Obama and company, they understandably think that armed blacks who refuse to recognize their law enforcement powers may be out to off them.”

In the class action lawsuit that Klayman filed in Dallas on Saturday, he alleges that he is personally in danger thanks to Obama, former Attorney General Eric Holder, Sharpton, Farrakhan and Black Lives Matter (Klayman refers to himself as a member of law enforcement since he used to be a prosecutor)

I suppose it's a good thing that Klayman clearly admits that police officers are pulling the trigger too quickly, but he has some very deranged ideas about who is to blame for that.

It's not exactly clear what the precise goal of this lawsuit is, but I don't expect it will actually go anywhere in a court room. I expect the first judge who sees it will do a double-take in bafflement before dismissing it. The sheer absurdity of this demands that it been crumpled up and tossed in the docket waste bin.

President Obama delivered a speech in Dallas just yesterday where he called for peace and understanding and national unity but, if you're a foaming at the mouth racist like Larry Klayman, that's not what you heard if you were listening at all. Klayman's twisted lizard brain didn't hear the president call for healing and justice, he heard him call for hate and destruction.

  • GrafZeppelin127

    Unfortunately, some defense attorney is going to have to make sense of this, and then move to dismiss it on any number of grounds. Stupid complaints and motions are even harder to oppose than good ones, because you first have to figure out what the hell the other party is actually talking about, and what they actually want. In other words, if you’re moving to dismiss a nonsensical complaint or opposing a nonsensical motion, you have to make sense of it first, before you can make out an argument against it.

  • Victor the Crab

    Privileged white douchebag whining about something he knows not the fuck about.

  • Aynwrong

    If I’m to believe Klayman is in any way serious about this than I have believe that he is a sniveling coward who should run home to mama and stick his head under a pillow until all the scary bogeymen are gone.

  • Georgie

    Can I sue him for assaulting common sense? What a dickhead.

    • Dread_Pirate_Mathius


      This is America. Sue away!

      Just make sure to one-up him on the damages he’s requesting.

  • muselet

    Larry Klayman is feeling ignored and out-crazied, so he felt compelled to do something pointless and stupid in order to get attention. This garbage fire certainly qualifies.

    Not a word of a lie, this is the final section of the lawsuit, headed PRAYER FOR RELIEF:

    Plaintiff, on behalf of himself and all members of the class including police officers and law enforcement persons of all races and ethnicities, Jews, and Caucasians , demands that judgment be entered against Defendants, each and every one of them, jointly and severally, for compensatory and actual damages because of their demonstrable physical and emotional injury to Plaintiffs, punitive damages because of Defendants’ callous and reckless indifference and malicious acts, and attorneys fees, costs, an award in excess of $500,000,000.00 or $1,500,000,000.00 in trebled damages where appropriate, punitive damages, and such other relief the Court may deem just and proper.

    That’s right, Larry Klayman is suing on behalf of police officers, Jews and caucasians for five hundred million dollars.

    He has as much chance of winning as he does of flapping his arms and flying to the Moon.

    But this gets him back into the public eye—kind of like a sty, only more annoying—which is all he really wants.


    • Hemidemisemiquaver

      which is all he really wants.

      And, if a rube or three sends him some money, he’s not gonna complain about that. Those steak dinners don’t pay for themselves, don’cha know?

  • Badgerite

    Well, you can know how to file a lawsuit and still not know your ass from a hole in the ground. Clearly.