Family Values the Lunch Box. Family Values the Breakfast Cereal.

Tim Murphy of Mother Jones posted a collection of conservative swag and conspiracy-theorist paraphernalia being sold and distributed at this year's World's Worst Persons Convention (CPAC).

As you might expect, the items that can be found at the convention wouldn't be out of place at a reunion for the John Birch Society. Here's a couple of my favorites.

This one is a t-shirt promoting the troops who were filmed pissing on dead Afghans.

And this one is really interesting. This is a book written in defense of the British Empire. I suppose if you think "anti-colonialism" is a bad thing, this book will speak to you.

Other works of genius, such as the "End the Fed" and "Bitch, Why'd You Taze Me?" bumperstickers can be found here.

Maybe I'm biased, but I don't see any real conservative value in any of the products or ideas being promoted at CPAC. At least, not in the traditional sense of what it means to be conservative.

CPAC is a Birch Society-sponsored session of vacation bible school held at a UFO convention.

  • muselet

    No humor, no creativity and no taste. The merchandisers at CPAC win the trifecta.


  • gescove

    “CPAC is a Birch Society-sponsored session of vacation bible school held at a UFO convention.” Perfect!

  • Ryan Carson

    Stumped! I know JM is making a movie reference with the title…I just can’t place it.

    • Ryan Carson

      Got it! Moychindizing!

  • holyreality

    Well, AHEM,

    Regarding the Federal Reserve Bank, the major misunderstanding of the monetary system is the FED is a private bank.

    The owners are people who make a huge pile of profits with every dollar paid in interest. The Dept of Treasury borrows from these banksters who create money from bonds the gummint promises to repay the vig.

    The IRS since Reagan collects out taxes, and pays directly to the FED to pay the interest on all that money they print from nothing(bonds)

    The monetary creation was originally envisioned and written into law that Congress was responsible.

    Federal Reserve Bank=private ownership=banksters

    Congress (or a modern Gummint Department)=real US Federal Control.

    I know Bob defends the FED, but private ownership of a Government function smells suspiciously of some F word sounding style of government that Upton Sinclair wrote about.

    Inadvertently, TP stickers saying End the Fed demand what the Founding Fathers (TM) originally wrote, a bigger government to handle the monetary creation.

    This beast is a infinite headed hydra, the fractional reserve money creation allows 9.1 times a bank’s holdings to go out as loans, thus creating 9.1 times more money, and so on and so on.

    After a century or so, the FED will always be overlords to us(Dept of Treasury/IRS) as our debt will never be repaid.

    How anyone can defend this system where a few banksters sit at the top while all of us wage slaves toil our lives away to keep the vig alive.

    • JMAshby


      Give it a fuckin’ rest.

      This entire line of thought is easily debunked by simply envisioning what would happen if the Tea Party congress was in charge of monetary policy.

      No more pitches for Ron Paul, please. I’ll probably delete them.

      • holyreality

        Apologies, I just point out that the government needs to create money, not greedy banksters, not tea party congressmembers.

        This is not a Ron Paul plea, just a logical point of fact.