Epic Fail

Cat Out of the Bag

Bless Ted Cruz for he has sinned.

Last week when no one knew about it, it wasn’t a problem, but now that everyone knows Ted Cruz is also a Canadian citizen, he plans to renounce it.

AUSTIN, Texas (AP) — U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz said Monday that he will renounce his Canadian citizenship.

The Texas Republican and tea party favorite announced his plans Monday night in a statement. The move comes in the wake of a report by The Dallas Morning News that Cruz holds dual U.S. and Canadian citizenship.

Personally I don’t care if he’s also a Canadian citizen, but I find this very amusing because he didn’t view it was a problem until everyone found out. Now that everyone knows, he’s rushing to prove that he’s a Real American just like you. Well, just like some of you, you liberal heathens.

And I’m trying to imagine the reaction if the president had revealed before he was elected that he was also a citizen of another country. It would have been a five-alarm-fire rather than this relative nothingburger. Because Ted Cruz is a white Republican.

Three years from now the idea that Cruz was once a citizen of another country will probably be painted as a conspiracy theory in a very ironic fashion. I can almost hear the cries of reverse racism now. But what Republican won’t understand or acknowledge is that if liberals bring up Ted Cruz’s origin, they’re most likely doing so for the purposes of Schadenfreude, not because they believe he’s a foreign, “exoctic,” spooky, secret-Muslim stereotype. There will be no liberal version of the crazy-hair lady telling Senator John McCain that Barack Obama is “an Arab.”

If anyone makes a very big deal out of this in the coming years, it will probably come from Ted Cruz’s right in the form of primary challengers.