In other news, famed hog slaughterer, Obamacare shooter, and Cobra cosplayer Joni Ernst won the Iowa Republican primary for U.S. Senate last night. Thanks, Mitt.
Meanwhile, Allen West is asking you to send him some money right away so he can put a stop to this whole Bergdahl business.
How will he do that? Osmosis. I guess.
Speaking of Bergdahl — his hometown has canceled their celebration of his return home because they were expecting too many protesters.