Conspiracy Theory Movies

Ron Johnson’s Conspiracy Theory

Wisconsin senator and man who sued his own staff members Ron Johnson (R) is about a year late on this, but he's sounding the alarm over the Lego Movie.

Johnson told a local reporter for WisPolitics.com that the animated film was actually a clever piece of anti-business propaganda which, according to him, was created for the explicit purpose of brainwashing American children.

Johnson said the latest evidence of this propaganda campaign is "The Lego Movie," in which the bad guy is a heartless businessman intent on destroying the world for profit. "That's done for a reason," Johnson said. "They're starting that propaganda, and it's insidious."

Go on.

Maurice-Moss-popcorn-GO

At a separate event earlier this month, video of which was posted to YouTube Thursday, Johnson recalled a phone conversation with a father who'd recently been assaulted by the same type of propaganda. Typically, when senators are calling people they don't know well -- it's known as "call time" -- they're fundraising. "I actually called a gentleman, it was a couple months ago, he was so upset, he took his children to an animated movie ... guess who the villain was? Evil Mr. Businessperson. It's insidious. That propaganda starts very early," said Johnson.

I have my doubts that an adult human being actually spoke to Ron Johnson about the fucking Lego Movie or, for that matter, had deep concerns about the nature of the villain of said movie, but he's right about one thing: you do have to catch'em early.

If we're going to convert unsuspecting children into anti-business, socialist zealots, the best way to do that is to take them to a corporate-owned movie theater and pay money to a corporation to see a movie based on a corporate-owned toy brand that will be preceded by at least half an hour of advertisements produced by other corporations. And in this optimal environment where brainwashing will occur, even the request to silence your cellphone will be branded by a corporation.

It's science.

  • McKinley

    Okay… Let someone make a big budget ‘tentpole’ movie where the villain is, say, a callous cold-hearted widow who refuses to sell her home for demolition so that a thoughtful, community-minded, puppy-loving corporate CEO can build a big box store –

    And see it get audience and critical acclaim. Right.

  • muselet

    Ron Johnson’s response (link at the update at the bottom of the HuffPo piece) is, if anything, even more incoherent than his initial remarks.

    He’s up for reelection next year, so this may just be an attempt to stave off a primary challenge from the Right. I hope that’s all this is, because if he actually believes The Lego Movie is insidious, anti-business propaganda, he’s completely hatstand.

    –alopecia

  • Toolymegapoopoo

    I know how to properly indoctrinate my kids. There is a nice hiking trail near our house that brings us up a large hill that allows us to look down on this valley. On one side of the valley is Federally protected land. On the other side is a massive McMansion development. On the protected side you can see a beautiful forest. On the McMansion side you can see ugly, cookie-cutter, 3-story behemoths stacked on top of one another. The tiny yards are practically treeless and there is evidence of significant erosion destroying what little lawn each house has. Even from about half a mile away you can see the heat ripples rising up from the endless central air conditioning units. I point to the forested side of the valley and tell my kids the US government protects that side. I point to the shit hole across from it and tell them a corporation protects that side. Which side would you like to go walking in?

    My kids love the Lego movie but they know it is just a movie about a toy they like. Showing them the real consequence of corporate greed is far more valuable in making them responsible citizens. Ron Jon is a blithering idiot.