Lizard People

Is Mike Pence a Lizard?

Written by SK Ashby

Watching Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump self-immolate and score a series of own-goals on national TV is very fun to watch according to his running mate Indiana Governor Mike Pence, who may or may not be lizard in a human suit.

Watch Pence talk about how fun "this shit" is with all the feigned emotion of Patrick Bateman.

PENCE: "You know, it is kind of funny. Sometimes it's like almost every day they come up with something new and different.

They say 'now we got 'em,' right? Now 'he said this, we can parse that' -- are you with me? -- 'he tweeted this.' And they think they finally got him, but then they turn on the television the next morning and Donald Trump is still there standing stronger than ever before and fighting for the American people.

This shit really is fun to watch, I'll tell you what."

Of course, people see Trump on the television every morning because he's A) running for president and B) says something wildly offensive several times per day every day of the week.

The past week was one of the worst weeks anyone has ever had in the history of presidential campaign politics.

Trump's team spent an entire week attacking former Miss Universe Alicia Machado. The New York Times revealed his billion dollar loss and income tax avoidance. Newsweek revealed his violation of the Cuban trade embargo. The Washington Post reported Trump's foundation wasn't registered to raise money. The Los Angeles Times reported that Trump told golf club managers to fire unattractive women. And those are just the biggest headlines.

Mike Pence couldn't be more delighted.