Conspiracy Theory Rand Paul Stupid Party

Rand Paul Will Investigate the Coming Military Coup

JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

In his fight against the non-existent plot to seize control of the American southwest through military force, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has found an ally in Kentucky senator and presidential candidate Rand Paul.

Rand son of Ron assuaged the fears of Iowa radio host Jan Mickelson by saying that he will investigate the matter.

"You know I've gotten a few questions about it on the road and I really don't—" Paul responded. "I'm not sure about exactly what is going on with that."

"It's making some people nervous, but it doesn't take much to make people nervous nowadays," Mickelson said. "If you get a chance to, I'd like to know what the rest of the story is on that."

"We'll look at that also," Paul assured him.

Rand could have just as easily said that there's nothing to it and that the U.S. military is not planning to take over Texas, but there's always that slim chance, I suppose, that a military coup is imminent.

Why the hell would anyone want to take over Texas?

  • Axomamma

    I would support invading Texas for the sole piurpose of giving it back to Mexico. A girl can dream?

  • theronware

    We’re living in an age where right wing politicians aren’t held to account for making outlandish statements to incite the cultists within their base. They’ll say whatever they think they can get away with, an informed democracy be damned!

  • muselet

    TPM commenter “LiberalJesus”:

    Here’s an idea Obama and his staff should consider. He can quell any talk of government takeover by immediately shutting down all military bases in Texas and shutting off the money tap that flows to these towns that have these bases…lets see what they say about that! Nothing says “we dont want your state” like shutting down bases

    –alopecia

  • gescove

    Maybe the idea is not to take Texas over, but to force it to leave at gunpoint.