Comedy Election 2016

Report: Chris Christie Literally Fetches Food for Donald Trump

JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

Everyone has made a joke about Chris Christie being Donald Trump's doorman or errand boy at some point, but we may have been more right than we thought.

If a report in the New Yorker is to be believed, the governor of New Jersey literally fetches McDonald's for Trump.

Governor Chris Christie, of New Jersey, another of Trump’s opponents early in the campaign, has transformed himself into a sort of manservant, who is constantly with Trump at events. (One Republican told me that a friend of his on the Trump campaign used Snapchat to send him a video of Christie fetching Trump’s McDonald’s order.)

If this video exists, it must be released to the world. Where's TMZ when you need them?

There may not be a single Republican remaining who hasn't humiliated themselves for Trump before this election is over.

  • Badgerite

    Literally? Like I said, he has made the Republican party his “b-tch.

    • Ken Kohl

      Well, they (GOP) have been long time whores, so the transition from ‘whore’ to ‘bitch’ s/be pretty easy for them.

      • Badgerite

        It is like the GOP has become the party of the grifters. Donald Trump is just selling the same stuff as Dick Cheney. But at least Darth Vader actually believed in what he was doing. Trump is just an vain glorious narcissist who noticed how well that stuff sold during the Bush administration and will repackage and resell the crap if it gets him what he wants which is to fly around in Air Force One so he can remind everybody who did not properly worship him way back when how ‘great’ he is.
        Truth is, were he to win the election, I would not rule out any terror attack being used by him as a pretext to declare martial law. He has no principles.
        None. No respect or regard for law or history or the Constitution of the United States. Everyone seems to exist to service his ego.

  • Victor the Crab

    All I can think about reading that article is “Drumph is a regular McDonald’s eater?” BWAH!!! How classy of that oversized Oompa Loompa!

  • Wow.
    I mean . . .

  • Another example of how they bow at the altar of money. There’s not much they won’t do to get it, keep it and prevent others from having it. Including being some asshole’s lackey.

  • Aynwrong

    Well, I’ve always thought of Drumpf as a clown. And Donald does rhyme with Ronald. Would this make Christie “Grimace?”

  • muselet

    I wonder if Chris Christie realizes how badly he’s being humiliated by the Trump campaigh. And, if he does, whether he minds.


    • Victor the Crab

      I couldn’t care less what Christie’s thinking, much less feeling sorry for him. He chose to sell his corpulent soul to that orange Satan on his own free will. And now, once considered a serious candidate for president, it looks like he’s become one of Drumph’s willfully pathetic minions. Couldn’t happen to a better lout.

      • muselet

        I don’t feel sorry for Chris Christie at all. I just wonder how self-aware he is (my five bucks says “not very”).