Steve King Has Gone Bye Bye, Egon

JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

We’ve entered the third (fourth?) day of Representative Steve King (R-IA) defending his comments on the majority of DREAMers being drug runners, but nothing he has said up to this point has been as bizarre as what he said today during an interview with Laura Ingraham.

King: For the point of public information, that description comes from many days down on the border, riding and sitting with the border patrol and without them at night, no night vision, watching the shadows come across the border, picking people up personally with my hands, unloading illegal drugs out of a vehicle with a false bottom under the truck.

I mean this is a personal experience and I sit there at night and border patrol agents would come to me one at a time in their civil clothes and talk to me clandestinely and they don’t want any names, locations, or dates. They want me to know what’s going on down there. This description is the description from that kind of experience.

Apparently Steve King is now a secret border control agent who spends his nights sitting alone in the dark watching the border. He has also picked up DREAMer drug smugglers ‘personally with his own hands.’ And, as he sits on the border at night, real border control agents will approach him in civilian clothes (to hide their identity) and give him the real story on immigration.

No names. No dates. Civilian clothing. Clandestinely. Because someone may observe King’s secret meetings with informants on the border at night where, sans nightvision, he ‘watches the shadows come across the border’ like some Minuteman Owl.

At least that’s what he claims occurs on those late nights.

Have you ever seen the back of a 20 dollar bill, on weed? Red team go!

  • cleos_mom

    At least King is more imaginative than his contemporaries with their ‘wide stances’ in mens’ restroom stalls. He cruises the border and uses “his own hands” on his pickups.

  • Razor

    Steve King is Robert DeNiro’s character in Machete.

  • Dennis Collins

    So lets see if we have heard this correctly. Rep. King travels to either west Texas or Arizona or maybe California, or possibly that little section of New Mexico, to spend the night alone without night vision equipment to watch shadows? That’s more than 1500 miles each way, 21+ hours traveling time, EACH WAY! No wonder the congress doesn’t get anything done, Rep. King isn’t present to spur them forward to greater heights, he’s in his car.
    I wonder if that travel is paid for by the taxpayer?

  • blackdaug

    So, Steve King (R-IA) spends a lot of time at night on the border observing various murky figures smuggling things across it.
    If they are coming from the setting sun: They are from around Omaha…that’s corn their carrying Steve.
    ….but if they are coming from the south: Those bags are full of fireworks from Jeff City.

  • Treading_Water

    As the Representative of Idaho, he must be talking about those Canadian-Mexicans, eh? Because, seriously, we don’t need any more crazy wingnut teahadists in Texas. We already have more than our allotment.

    • Dennis Collins

      Iowa treading water, IOWA not Idaho.

      • Treading_Water

        Oops, I’m very confused. My apologies to Idaho. Not as confused as Steve King, who must have been manning the Iowa/Nebraska border to guard against those Nebraska-Mexicans that have been stealing over the border smuggling cantaloupes and marijuana.

  • D_C_Wilson

    In all seriousness, I am starting to believe that both Steve King and Louie Ghomert may actually have a mental illness. This is not a “they’re batshit crazy!” joke. I think there is something medically wrong with their brains.

    • Victor_the_Crab

      Then there must be something in the air or in the water of their home districts, because the people there keep electing these two jackasses to Congress.

  • Lazarus Durden

    He is The Coon of Coon & Friends AKA The GOP

  • Teddy’s Person

    Seriously, Steve, STOP talking.

    • Lazarus Durden

      No way! Steve keep talking. It’s kind of awesome. *grabs popcorn*

      • Teddy’s Person

        You have more gastrointestinal
        fortitude than I do.

  • fry1laurie

    Using the code name “Carlos Danger”, right?