Election 2016

Ted Cruz Drops Out of the Race, Donald Trump is the Nominee

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JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

Senator and Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz has officially dropped out of the race after Trump’s easy victory in the Indiana primary.

INDIANAPOLIS — Senator Ted Cruz of Texas announced Tuesday that he was ending his presidential campaign, bowing to the reality that his crushing loss in Indiana all but assured the nomination of Donald J. Trump.

“From the beginning, I have said that I will continue on as long as there is a viable path to victory,” he told supporters here. “Tonight, I am sorry to say, it appears that path has been closed.”

Unfortunately for her, this also means Carly Fiorina will not get to be vice president. Her brief run as the vice presidential hopeful lasted less than a week.

The writing has been on the wall for a while, but it has now become reality: Donald Trump is the Republican nominee for president in 2016.

This doesn’t necessarily mean the Republican convention in July will not be a complete shitshow, it may simply take on a different form. While the prospect of a contested convention increased the likelihood that we will see riots in the streets of Cleveland, the convention will now be headlined and organized by glorified gameshow host Donald Trump.

Clint Eastwood’s empty chair may look dignified and respectful before Donald Trump’s Luxurious Extravaganza Extreme 2016 is complete.

  • Aynwrong

    Ted’s dead baby, Ted’s dead.

  • Victor the Crab

    Now Cruz can spend time at home bare bum spanking his two young daughters with an open hand as his thumb sized boner hardens because he’s that vile a piece of shit.

  • fry1laurie

    Poor Ted will have to go back to the Senate, where he can obstruct his little (literally) heart out.

  • Scopedog

    ….And yet we will continue to hear the whining about how Hillary can’t win, how the Democrats should have stood behind Sanders–even though Sanders trails Hillary in both delegates and votes (and he trails Trump in votes too).

    Hillary is ahead of both of them. Of course we should not be complacent, but I do not feel that this will be 2000 again. Hillary has stood up against the kind of sh@! that the GOP and Trump will unleash on her; she’s had to face it for nearly 30 years.

    And for any Sanders supporter calling themselves “progressive” and yet claim that they will vote for Trump to get even with the Democrats and Hillary, kindly go f@#! yourself. There is too much at stake and we do not have the time or the patience for your adolescent nonsense that’s on the level of a baby showing his pee pee.

    • Victor the Crab

      That diaper baby claude, who trolls the Banter, needs to be the first to get a literal “go fuck yourself!”