Bob and Chez Show

The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show 7/30/15

Bob and Chez
Written by Bob and Chez

RELM_buttonPhil: Sarah Palin Gets Totally Confused with Bill O'Reilly; The Insufferable Jesse Watters Punches More Hobos; It's Possible to Care About Cecil the Lion and Other Issues at the Same Time; Bob's Latest Twitter Battle with Dan Bidondi; The Bionic Dan Bidondi Bionic Italian Airlines; and much more. Brought to you by Bubble Genius, the BobCesca.com Amazon Link and The Bowen Law Group.

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  • Victor the Crab

    Holy! Fuck! Sarah Palin’s mind and mouth just keep getting worse and worse everytime she’s in the spotlight. I wouldn’t call Bill O’Reilly the voice of reason. He lobbed a big fat one to Palin so she could knock it out of the park by getting her to say Planned Parenthood is racist, and instead Palin tries to head-butt it and failed miserably, leaving O’Reilly to wonder why he even talks to her.

    Sarah Palin is a stupid, stupid person.

  • John Frum

    I’m surprised Palin’s Double Big Gulp right when O’Relly stumped her went unmocked. That cracked me up. You could pair it with Alex Jones’ hairball and make a wingnut beatbox Duran Duran. The Reflux!

    Hit me face! The Germans have a word for this: “Backpfeifengesicht” means a face that badly needs a punch. I am not making this up! Maybe that’s what the “B” in @jessebwatters stands for.

    Speaking of Backpfeifengesicht: Walter Palmer is such a walking stereotype of whitebread priivilege pussy. You could probably go right down the checklist: gun nut, biblethumper, Fox news chump, probably never uses the words “President” and “Obama” in contiguous order. And if he ever did actually eat an animal he killed, he’d still waste it by drenching it in ketchup. I wonder Animal Cruelty Safaris are so expensive because they need extra room service for putting out fires and cleaning piss off the beds.

    • muselet

      German has some wonderful idioms that translate very badly. My (incredibly literal) translation widget insists Backpfeifengesicht means “baking whistle face,” which may or may not be true—the German Embassy doesn’t think so—but is hilarious.

      Either translation works well for Jesse Watters.

      Incidentally, my favorite German idiom is Radfahrer. Literally “bicyclist,” it’s a very useful word for “a kiss-up, kick-down kind of guy.” Every organization is filled with such creatures.

      –alopecia

      • McKinley

        Google Translator makes it “slaps face”.

        • muselet

          Google Translate understands idiomatic expressions—German idiomatic expressions, at least—better than SYSTRAN (which does the back-end for Apple’s Translation widget). Good to know.

          –alopecia

  • Badgerite

    Not only can people multi-task ( you can care about both BLM and Cecil the Lion ) but the killing of this particular lion who served as a tourist attraction and therefore a wealth generator for people who lived in the area , is really an affront to the nation that this dentist was visiting. An abuse of their laws and their hospitality. African lives matter too. And African sovereignty. This guy didn’t just kill an animal, he assaulted the laws and sovereignty of the country he was in. They had to lure this animal off of a national preserve. Please don’t tell me that this guy was unaware of this fact. What’s more, one cannot escape the conclusion that since this lion had some press attached to his name, this man may have targeted him precisely for that reason. He deserves all the scorn that can be heaped on him. And some legal consequences as well.

    • muselet

      From the BBC:

      The US dentist who killed a lion in Zimbabwe should be extradited to face charges, Zimbabwe’s Environment Minister Oppah Muchinguri has said.

      Walter Palmer’s extradition was being sought so that he could “be held accountable for his illegal action,” she said.

      I’m no fan of Robert Mugabe’s kleptocratic kakistrocracy, but I applaud the Environment Minister for this.

      Even if Palmer isn’t ultimately extradited (extradition in this case is unlikely, at best), he’ll suffer some sleepless nights and burn through a goodly chunk of his life savings in the process. It’s not much, but it’s something.

      –alopecia

      • John Frum

        I have to admit to some mixed feelings about this. I’m not sure it’s fair to dump this whole problem on him. He’s an idiot. He deserves an idiot’s punishment — public disgrace and
        shame, and whatever social or business problems emerge from it, fine.
        But he doesn’t deserve to rot in some third world prison.

        Lions are almost extinct from decades of wasteful entertainment slaughter. But everyone wants the money and Mugabe has treated it the way Republicans treat pollution disasters. Sure, we’ll get right on that. Darn those poachers and their dirty bribe money anyway. If throwing Palmer under the bus would do any good, I’d be all for it. But it’s not. It’s just another hysterical media frenzy. It will be forgotten as soon as some more egregious douchebag gives us something to scrawl on a Starbucks cup. And we have another, completely unmanageable country to figure in. Then both Cecil’s life and Palmer’s will have been wasted for nothing.

        The problem not Palmer. It’s that hysterical media frenzy is all we can do. Lions are doomed.We don’t even do anything more these same kinds of people are slaughtering our own fucking schoolchildren. Until we get our shit together, give Palmer at least some props for finding somewhere to get his guns and cruelty ya-yas besides a movie theater. At least he tried.

        • muselet

          Humans have always bollixed up the management of top predators. Well, charismatic megafauna in general, but top predators in particular.

          Again, Zimbabwe is governed by awful people (the irony is that Robert Mugabe would, with some justification, have been considered the moral and political equal of Nelson Mandela if he’d left office after two terms as President). However, the government has set up wildlife preserves, and Cecil’s home range was within one of them. Too little, too late? Perhaps, but at least the Zimbabweans were trying something. I don’t blame the Environment Minister for being peeved that a qing wa cao de liu mang (frog-humping sonofabitch, if you’re not a Firefly fan) like Walter Palmer shot an officially-protected lion.

          (Necessary parenthetical: I’m not naive, or it pleases me so to believe. I doubt most of Zimbabwe’s government gives two hoots and a damn about lions or any other wildlife within its borders. The country’s wildlife preserves are, more than anything, intended to attract foreign tourists and their hard currency. Actual wildlife conservation is a happy side effect for the government; the conservation officers working in the preserves, on the other hand, would have other priorities.)

          The US almost certainly won’t extradite Palmer over this, no matter how much of an idiot he is or how much the Zimbabwean government huffs and puffs. But his lawyer will (rightly) insist he has to be represented in any official proceeding just in case.

          On the one hand, he won’t actually be punished in an official, judicial sense. On the other hand, he’ll be bankrupt, or as near as damn it, at the end of the process.

          I can live with that.

          –alopecia

  • Badgerite

    You know who is not needed. Sarah Palin and her idiotic, grating, shrill, dishonest, harpy voice.

  • muselet

    [EXPLETIVE DELETED] (Ask your parents, kids.)

    My computer decided to freeze just as I finished typing comments on the show. First time it’s happened in over three years, so I can’t complain too loudly, but the timing blows. What follows is a quick recap of what got lost.

    Dan Bidondi is a pilot “licensed to pilot a Cessna,” presumably meaning a small prop plane and not a Citation (if he does have a type rating on a Citation, I’m going to hide under my bed for a while), The service ceiling of a Cessna 182 is 18,000 feet (for a 152 or 172, it’s around 14,000 feet). You can’t see the curvature of the Earth at 18,000 feet. The number I’ve seen online is closer to 55–60,000 feet. Either Bidondi is lying or he’s flown too long at high altitude, without using oxygen.

    A schizophrenic homeless person is not a fair target even for a bottom-feeder like Jesse Watters. I genuinely hope Watters’s dog bites him.

    Sarah Palin sounds like she’s been flying with Dan Bidondi at high altitude, without oxygen.

    I find Bill O’Reilly more offensive than either Jesse Watters or Sarah Palin. He’s a smarmier arsehole than Watters could ever hope to be, and Palin is just a nitwit.

    I know I was more witty than that—as well as far more prolix—but I have neither the energy nor the memory to do better.

    Technology is wonderful until it’s not.

    –alopecia

  • aynwrong

    I can just imagine Jesse Watters standing off to side and off camera, holding a big white poster that says SAY THE WORD RACIST!!! while Bill tries to get her to look in that direction.

    When I listen to Watters, what comes to mind is David Spade from PCU:
    https://www.google.com/search?q=niedermeyer&prmd=ni&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAmoVChMI6LuQlbiExwIVCi2ICh08qQGY&biw=360&bih=519&dpr=3#tbm=isch&q=david+spade+pcu&imgrc=K0wkxgvY23LeIM%3A