Election 2016 Libertyfreedumb Rand Paul

There Will Be No More “Dumbass Live Streams” of Rand’s Dumbass Campaign, Which is Dead

JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

To my dismay, there will be no more "dumbass live streams" of Rand's campaign for at least the next four years.

Rand son of Ron has officially dropped out of the race for the Republican presidential nomination.

"It's been an incredible honor to run a principled campaign for the White House. Today, I will end where I began, ready and willing to fight for the cause of Liberty," Paul said in a statement. "Although, today I will suspend my campaign for President, the fight is far from over. I will continue to carry the torch for Liberty in the United States Senate and I look forward to earning the privilege to represent the people of Kentucky for another term."

Rand is still ready and willing to "fight for the cause of liberty" unless, of course, you're a minority, gay, or pregnant.

Rand son of Ron tarnished his image and his campaign before it was even officially launched by wedding himself to the anti-choice movement. Rand also toured colleges where he told students that we don't need laws against discrimination in the workplace because they should leave their sexuality at home.

Liberty!

Before officially launching his campaign, Rand also went to enormous lengths to paint himself as a warhawk who would take the fight to Syria and ISIS in ways President Obama and Hillary Clinton never will. Unfortunately for him, nobody believed it. Moreover, he muddied his own message with a long series of contradictory speeches and policy positions.

As insincere as I believe him to be, Rand son of Ron was and still is the only Republican presidential candidate to even broach the subject of criminal justice reform, but he also abandoned that platform after discovering Republican primary voters do not care about Black Lives.

The Rand Paul Libertarian electorate simply doesn't exist and it never will but I certainly expect he will run for president again.

  • Sadly, as you say, he’ll be back.

  • I hope his campaign puts out more MSPaint + voice-simulator videos though.

  • muselet

    This, after Rand Paul spent $500,000 (of other people’s money) to the Kentucky Republican Party to change from a primary to a caucus.

    Sure was a great investment on his part, wasn’t it?

    –alopecia

    • Aynwrong

      That’s called fiscal austerity.

  • GrafZeppelin127

    Rand is still ready and willing to “fight for the cause of liberty” unless, of course, you’re a minority, gay, or pregnant.

    The “libertarian” concept of “liberty” does not include those civil liberties that are enforceable against other private citizens, including (but not limited to) freedom from commercial and employment discrimination. They think “liberty” means (a.) personal autonomy, and (b.) freedom from government interference in one’s personal autonomy. They don’t believe in liberty to the extent they themselves have to respect, and may be liable for interfering with, the rights of others.

  • “still is the only Republican presidential candidate to even broach the subject of criminal justice reform”

    I know that surprised the hell out of me too. I think he was trying to get Independents and conservative dems with that one. Now that’s another one down, only a 1,000 more GOP candidates to go.

    • JMAshby

      He was chasing a block of voters that don’t really exist. Most Republicans recoil at the sound of “criminal justice reform” because what they hear is “throw less black people in prison” and they like black people in prison. There aren’t enough young single white guys that just want to get high to win a primary.

      This is why anyone who thinks the GOP congress was going to seriously tackle criminal justice reform is delusional. It was never going to happen. The only way they would reform the system is by making it worse.

    • This is Rand Paul though, who can talk about criminal justice reform out of one side of his mouth while casually condoning the use of drones to shoot liquor-store thieves. It’s pretty much a wash.