Child President

Trump Lawyers to Mueller: Our Client is a Big Dumb Liar

JM Ashby
Written by JM Ashby

We all know Donald Trump to be a pathological liar and a moron, but we're a bunch of diabolical liberals; who cares what we think?

Well, you don't have to take it from us. Trump's lawyers say the same thing.

The Wall Street Journal reports that Trump's lawyers have told special prosecutor Robert Mueller that if Trump sits down for an interview with him, he'll probably make shit up.

Members of Mr. Trump’s legal team have increasingly soured on the notion of letting the president talk face-to-face with Mr. Mueller, concluding the risks are too high, according to people familiar with the discussions. One person said the lawyers have concluded that an interview with the special counsel would amount to a “perjury trap” and an “impeachment trap.” [...]

Mr. Trump’s lawyers have told Mr. Mueller that for practical reasons the best way to get answers is not a direct, one-on-one interview with the president. Rather than admit he didn’t know the answer, Mr. Trump might barrel ahead with an explanation that might prove wrong, a person familiar the matter said.

Every once in a while it hits you that the "president" is a complete fucking idiot.

  • muselet

    Donald Trump sure has assembled himself a crack legal team, hasn’t he?


    • Can you imagine what those lawyers are thinking? What on earth would compel any lawyer to take his case? There’s not enough money in the world….

  • fry1laurie

    “Barrel ahead”. Like down Niagara Falls.

  • Christopher Foxx

    One person said the lawyers have concluded that an interview with the special counsel would amount to a “perjury trap” and an “impeachment trap.”

    It’s not a “trap” when it’s set by the person giving the testimony.

  • Georgie

    Oh good lord, his own lawyers are calling him stupid but yet no one from base seems is mortified. smfh.

  • Aynwrong

    I’m gonna go ahead and assume that every single answer Trump would have Robert Mueller going…*bKhLWWImDaDT4CoKJmVg-w.gif

  • David Greenberg

    Someone Trump resents and envies, because he thinks they look down on him, should needle him in some way, perhaps via Twitter, that he is afraid to talk to Mueller. His fragile ego would compel him to do the interview. Then sit back with your favorite beverage and snacks and love the show.

    • Aynwrong

      Who doesn’t Trump resent and envy?

      • 1933john


        • Aynwrong


    • ninjaf

      Preferably someone female or a person of color.

      Oooooh…perhaps one of the Obamas? (I know. They’re too classy to do that. But STILL!)

  • ninjaf

    Every once in a while?

    • Nefercat

      Every time he opens his piehole is more like it.

    • Christopher Foxx

      Yeah. The same way that “every once in a while” your heart is beating.

    • JMAshby

      I just think there is some distance between being generally aware that Trump is a moron and seeing him display the mental capacity and maturity of a small child. Sometimes it hits you.

      • I agree. Like a three year old engaged in magical thinking–he isn’t lying–he believes what he says when he says it. The world must be a VERY confusing place to Trump.

  • 1933john

    Transcript (Extract)

    Question 1—–Mueller: “Are you Donald Trump”?————

    Answer:——–Trump: “NO”!———————————–

  • Draxiar

    Well gee…that’s not Mueller’s problem.