Election 2016 Wingnuts

Bobby Jindal Begs Nation to Take Him Seriously

Written by SK Ashby

Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal knows the recipe and ingredients for the secret sauce, but he's not willing to share it with the rest of us.

Speaking to CNN yesterday, Jindal boasted that he is the only candidate with a detailed plan for sinking the nation into depression.

"I spent the last year and a half putting together details policies on energy, healthcare, education, foreign policy. I'm the only potential candidate with a detailed plan to repeal and replace Obamacare," Jindal said in an interview with CNN on Thursday.

If you're like me, you couldn't even read that with a straight face.

Bobby Jindal's plan for energy consists of drilling for oil off vulnerable coastlines such as his own. His plan for healthcare consists of following in the footsteps of Paul Ryan by privatizing Medicare and block-granting Medicaid. His plan for education is to drive the public university system of Louisiana, including LSU itself, to the brink of bankruptcy. And his plan for foreign policy is to declare war against the non-existent threat of "no-go zones" and creeping Sharia law.

All of that may sound vague, but so are his detailed plans. That is the gist of it.

Jindal won't formally announce whether he is running for president or not until June 11th at the earliest, but I think we can safely write him off as a serious contender.

Recent polls indicate that Jindal may not even crack the top 10 list of candidates that the RNC will allow on stage during primary debates. Donald Trump, on the other hand, would be welcome.