Conspiracy Theory

According to National Rifle Association (NRA) executive vice president Wayne LaPierre, while the Obama Administration has been sympathetic toward gun-rights advocates during his first term in office, it's actually just a ruse to fool you into thinking he isn't going to take away your guns during his second term.

“[The Obama campaign] will say gun owners — they’ll say they left them alone,” LaPierre told an audience at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) Friday. “In public, he’ll remind us that he’s put off calls from his party to renew the Clinton [assault weapons] ban, he hasn’t pushed for new gun control laws… The president will offer the Second Amendment lip service and hit the campaign trail saying he’s actually been good for the Second Amendment.”

“But it’s a big fat stinking lie!” the NRA leader exclaimed. “It’s all part of a massive Obama conspiracy to deceive voters and destroy the Second Amendment in our country.”

“Obama himself is no fool. So when he got elected, they concocted a scheme to stay away from the gun issue, lull gun owners to sleep and play us for fools in 2012. Well, gun owners are not fools and we are not fooled,” La Pierre declared.

Amazing! He sure fooled me!

This administration has also kept the country largely safe and set us on a path toward a more coherent foreign policy agenda, but that may also be a delicate ruse to make you think he isn't a secret Muslim, terrorist sympathizer!

Expect a surplus of The Crazy™ to surface over the next several days as CPAC transpires.